Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize
