But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
