Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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