I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize
