just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I need to stop coming to work sober
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
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