I just made out with a guy for $7.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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