Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
