Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
