Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
It's rum buckets o'clock
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