dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I think your dad took our porno
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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