you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
