508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I just pynch a tree in the face
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
