Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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