Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
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