i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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