i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
