but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I'd cum for enchiladas.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
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