therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
