Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Randomize
