How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
