I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I'm sobbing to NWA
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Randomize
