Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
