She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I think I sprained my soul last night
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Randomize
