And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
