And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize