i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
