you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize
