Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize