i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
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