Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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