OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Randomize
