all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I don't deserve a penis
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
