So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
