You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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