Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
