so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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