so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
