My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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