She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize