He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
