Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize
