Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize
