I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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