I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Randomize