i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
