Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I will be naked everywhere
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Randomize
