i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize