just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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