Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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