ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
