Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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