yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
