this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
